PP Is For The Potty: A Sneaky Way You're Losing Productivity In Your Business
By “PP”, I'm referring to “People-Pleasing,” (as I'm sure you assumed).
Continuing my series on time & productivity:
One of your best tools for increasing your productivity? Saying No.
Listen, I'll be the first to admit that I’ve got a black belt in People Pleasing. It's something I'm continuing to work on. (There's a reason I became a therapist specializing in People Pleasers and Perfectionists; I learned a lot about it while working on myself!).
As a business coach, I see it all the time: Solopreneurs letting their time and energy (and profits!) get sucked away by saying “Yes” to things they want to say “No” to.
Sometimes it's little things: requests to “pick your brain” from folks who don't want to invest in your work, favor-requests from friends during your designated work-time, the occasional teeeeny little boundary-violation that you want to brush off as “no big deal", but know you're going to use a lot of brain-power ruminating about all day…
Those little energy-sucks can add up to big losses in productivity.
Learning when and how to say “No” is one of the best skills you can develop for you and your business.
I could write a whole book on this, but I'll keep it short:
Don't prioritize your fear of people not liking you over your need to make your dream business happen.
(It's possible that they may not like you, but it's often more likely that after their initial irritation, they'll start to actually respect you, and like you even more).
By the way, saying “No” doesn't have to be mean. It can be phrases like,
“Thanks for asking, but that's not going to work for my schedule.”
“I really have to prioritize finishing my obligations to paying clients right now, so I'm going to decline.”
“Yes, that's my current fee; my one sliding-scale spot is currently full.”
“No thank you. I do hope you find someone who can help with that.”
There's so much more great language out there for saying No. (I love that in his book Tribe of Mentors, Tim Ferriss got permission to publish all the “Tactful-No” letters he got from people who declined to contribute, simultaneously sharing their wisdom while respecting their time-boundaries).
What do you need to say No to? Where can you please your productivity instead of people-pleasing? What's your favorite language for saying No when you have the urge to people-please?
I'd love to hear more. Share in the comments.